:: Searching for Puck... ::

:: Tuesday, July 22, 2003 ::

I went out looking for myself today.

Well, not at first. At first, I woke up at 3 in the afternoon for the third day in a row, and who knows why. It isn't as if I got to bed late enough to justify that. When I woke up, I drove Joe out to Monmouth Beach to help install his grandmother's air conditioner. I haven't been helping out around the house as much as I'd like to, so I figured a peace offering was in order.

After I dropped Joe back home, I went to taco bell and got a quick bite to eat - I hadn't eaten since about 9 last night, so, it being nearly 24 hours without food, I figured I was due. I drove aimlessly and ended up in keansburg. I was going to play some pinball, but I didn't feel like being around people, so I walked the beach instead. I ended up on the rock jetty just as the storm blew in, so I stripped to my jeans and bra, let down my hair, and faced the storm head-on with arms outstretched.

It's only in rare moments like those that I feel right with the world. I screamed pain and hurt into the storm and it pelted me back with hard drops of cold water against my bare skin. That is a baptism. It is not some passive act with white gowns and calm churches...it is forcefully washing your transgressions and lack of assurance away with the wild fury of lightning and stormwinds. The waves crashed up to my ankles, and my hair and jeans were completely soaked with sea-spray and rain...the wind blew at me, and curved up from the rocks to lift my hair up and let it crash wetly back onto my bare spine. I feel clean, now. I feel right. I am born again in the arms of the sea.

~Fox


:: Fox 7/22/2003 09:25:00 PM [Say what?] ::
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