:: Searching for Puck... ::

:: Sunday, June 15, 2003 ::

Okay, so, most of you are familiar with my frustration with dating sites.

Lately, I have a new complaint.

I pay money to be on certain sites...mostly I go through the 'credit' sites...sites where you pay for x amount of abilities to reply to someone's ad. I like the sites, especially ones like lavalife, because they're all-inclusive. Browsing, email, instant messaging, offline messaging...all a part of the website program.

I'm forgetful, so I tend to use the same username for all my dating sites - my IM name, to be specific. I use different passwords, but I like my username to remain the same...that way if I hit it off on the site and my time talking to someone is about to run out, I can just say - same name on AIM and they can get ahold of me.

God knows how the under-rock-dwelling poor excuses for homo sapiens that have been IMing me lately have managed to put two and two together. They can't even manage to type "y-o-u" or "y-o-u a-r-e", and that's not even bringing into account the grammar. I'm sorry. Some women demand their men be at least as good looking as models, I demand that mine spell correctly and be able to hold up their side of conversation.

My own distaste aside, I'm rather angry that they get in touch with me outside of the site, because the vast (VAST) majority don't even bother to read my ad, and if they do, just don't give a damn that they're 48 or growing cannibis in their closets. They are STUDS, damnit, and OBVIOUSLY I will be so utterly in awe of their sheer masculinity that I will promptly swoon and shed my clothes in the same efficent movement.

This is not the case. In fact, they don't have pictures, profiles, or even a general grasp of conversational coherency. They don't understand dating site ettiquette.

An example. How does 'real' dating work? Ideally, flirting glances, the physical move to be closer, then conversation, then exchange of numbers, then calls, then maybe a date, then either nooky of some sort, or another date and THEN nooky of some sort. (I'm just basing this on what I see my friends doing. I don't "date", I pay penance for some gross error in a past life.)

What these guys are doing is the cyber equivelent of getting really drunk and tailing a girl to her apartment, without knowing anything about her except how she looks, knocking on the door, and asking with a sloppy and non-endearing inebriated grin if she'd like to..."you know. do it."

Not at all charming, I can assure. I pay money to be on these sites, and these wastes of human flesh are bothering me, taking up my time without so much as a picture of themselves, a profile, or a general idea of who they even are, and expecting me to have sex with them. It's really kind of pathetic. I suppose it's partly my fault for using the same name, but still. They should have common courtesy and bother to read my ad before contacting me off the site. I would do the same for them.

Here are some examples of *actual* conversational gems bestowed upon yours truly by one of these people:

i can give it to you like u need

u have nice big breasts

with how many guys have u had sex through this website?

so i guess im not ur cup of tee

.....now, let me assure that I did nothing to solicit said comments, except for the last one, which was after my polite rejection. Men feel it is pertinent to address me like a streetwalker, because obviously I am reduced to such status in the presence of such fine hunks of grade a beef (see above commentary on masculinity).

Just another fruitless rant on the gradual decline of society. Sigh.



(By the by, I am actually a very nice girl. No one, meeting me face to face, could ever call me a bitch. I am polite and gentle in all my declining of dates...it simply happens that people on the internet feel the need to eschew all semblences of civility, and so I choose to take the low road by posting and mocking - if only because it's so damn satisfying.)

~Fox



:: Fox 6/15/2003 06:11:00 PM [Say what?] ::
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