:: Searching for Puck... ::

:: Saturday, April 12, 2003 ::

Had a good time with Alex...

We went to the Court Jester for dinner, then the liquor store (I still have a full 6 pack of Smirnoff Ice and 5 fulls of michelobe - he bought that, not me - down in my room) and then Blockbuster. We picked out Secretary (I'd been dying to see...I was a little dissapointed in it, frankly) and 13 Conversations about the same thing (haven't seen it yet). We got the movies pretty late, and After secretary was over, stayed up talking. He wanted to sleep with me, the feeling wasn't mutual, so we didn't and I slept in my clothes. He ended up crashing over here because it was really late and rainy. He left about an hour ago.

There used to be something comforting about hanging out with a guy that I knew didn't want to seriously date me and vice-versa. But with Jay, and now 'lex...it's sort of a huge emotional void. I want to connect with someone again. I forget who said it, but the saying goes "The difference between a man who isn't in love and one who is, is the difference between an unlighted lamp and one that is lit." I want to be lit. I want to be lit up. Where is someone for me to love? To cherish? I want to make someone else happy again. I want to call the same person and tell them about my day, consistently. I want to hear about someone elses' life, and sympathize with their losses and rejoice in their fortune. I want someone to go on a picnic with in Deepcut Park.

I can only hope that with the snow melting, I'll find someone. I've heard spring is when most relationships start?

~Fox
:: Fox 4/12/2003 11:11:00 AM [Say what?] ::
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