:: Searching for Puck... ::

:: Wednesday, January 15, 2003 ::

I'm falling behinnnndddd in my postings.

Okay, so the night before last, Trysh kidnapped me along with Sharon and we all went to the pool hall. I guess me and Trysh are on semi-good terms again. We ended up picking up Jim, Andre, and Dave and we drove around a lot and didn't get home til 4 am. It was nuts.

Mark called me last night. He isn't much for talking on the phone, but it was nice to hear from him. He's one of the few guys that return my calls when they say they're going to.

Jordan and I are speaking again. I'm still very wary of his claims of faith, but it's been so long since I found another person of my faith that I'm unwilling not to give him every chance I can. I want to believe he isn't trying to lead me on through my faith.

I had a strange dream last night, which is why I'm writing. When I was out with Trysh, we stopped by Tim's house, a guy I've known since my keyport days, six years ago. He's fallen far into a state of disrepair, jobless and taking sothu nearly all the time now...his aura is covered in it. I see him slowly dying spiritually and I can't help him anymore. Still, I tried to be upbeat and tell him how good it was to see him again, but he was condescending to me, which greatly saddened my spirit and even made me question myself in a moment of weakness as to whether I was a good and growing person. Those of small minds will always try and hinder those of great, I suppose.

In my dream, I took his tattoos...all the ones that he has and others, and transferred them to my own body. On the underside of my right wrist was a tribal spider and web. On the top of my right wrist was a detailed dark rose-and-thorn pattern. On my left bicep there was a many-leafed sothu branch and the number 460 beneath it. (420 for sothu and 40 for a 40 ounce beer, for some reason I knew this) the only two tatts Tim actually has, (that I remember) were his eye of horus, which was on my right shoulderblade and his line-and-red-loop wrist tatt, which was over my left wrist. It was a very strange merging of the two of us, like the tattoos somehow infused me with a power. I feel nothing for Tim, so I know it isn't affection that caused the dream...nor do I worry after him...he is lost to my kind and has been awhile, so I let him to Jehove with peace. It has been a long while since I had so vivid a dream, and I really don't know what it means...

~Fox
Penny for your thoughts?
:: Fox 1/15/2003 12:27:00 PM [Say what?] ::
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